WANTED: Product Placement Negotiator (Hollywood). Sell Chinese South China Sea Domination ....Like A KiwiFruit.
Territorial aggression via product placement in movies, it works ! Fool the kids, and adults too. For fun, profit and territorial expansion. Are you the right fit for this job ?
You Probably Can Fool The Children Of The Revolution:
T Rex performing at a Young Liberals function celebrating anticipated electoral victory in 1972.
See if you can recognise young John and Janet Howard dancing in the crowd (0:34 or thereabouts).
DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES………?
Wanted to Hire:
Product Placement Negotiator.
Industry:
Entertainment media - Movies and TV production
Location:
Mainly Hollywood, LA, USA. Occasional travel required.
Task:
Product placement in movies and TV.
Product:
Territorial control of the South China Sea.
Detailed Work Description:
The qualified advertising sales professional is to negotiate the insertion of maps into storylines of upcoming major movies for international release.
These maps must depict the nine dash line of Chinese claims over the South China Sea.
Must be placed in such a way as to normalise acceptance of these borders by viewers. Particular emphasis is on movies for younger people.
Skills Required:
Persuasion, creative script alteration, wining and dining, and whatever it takes to get the deal done. Maps for insertion are often superfluous to the script, requiring creative plot solutions and incentives to motivate entertainment industry executives to cooperate.
An above market salary, big bonuses and a lavish unaudited expense account will be available for the successful candidate.
In the event that charges of bribery or political influence / interference be made against our employee, asylum in a luxury penthouse apartment near SanYa, Hainan will be made available indefinitely, including living allowance and lifestyle assistance aided by a team of comfort professionals.
Some examples of the work of the previous executive follow and are illustrative of our requirements:
MOVIES:
Barbie (2023)
Dora The Explorer (2019)
Actually it was the map in the movie version that got edited in Malaysia. Seems to have been scrubbed from the internet.
Abominable (Dreamworks / Pearl Studio 2019)
Where possible, gain assistance from your local party cell, eg “Abominable” was a JV with Chinese Company Pearl Studio.
Uncharted (Sony) (2022)
TV SHOWS:
Madam Secretary
USA TV show implying A US President accepted China’s SCS claims.
Pine Gap Netflix / ABC
Somebody gets paid to negotiate Chinese nine-dash map displays in Western media.
Does this sound like the job for you ?
Qualifications:
Qualifications required are the same as for any media role in China:
As per the above, qualifications are expected to be the same as any other media job in China:
Have Chinese nationality / citizenship.
Firm political position (ie pro CCP), support the CCP leadership and the socialist system, possess a fine political character and virtuous qualities.
Have the actual qualifications and professional capability (ie can actually do the job).
Law abiding, healthy body, no record of inappropriate activity or behaviour, no membership of illegal organisations, no participation in illegal activities or other blemishes on their record, never been sentenced for a crime or sacked from a job.
If that sounds like you, call your local information warfare recruitment office today and seek further information !!
What’s Product Placement ?
Subliminal Advertising:
Product placement is a kind of subliminal advertising as demonstrated in the movie: “The Fabulous Baker Boys” selling NZ Kiwifruit. Subliminal advertising should not be noticed but should be absorbed subconsciously by the target.
It’s basically a form of brainwashing.
Ironically, the Kiwifruit scene in FBB is memorable precisely because it is completely out of context and stilted1.
"This hit, that ice cold Michelle Pfeiffer, that white gold kiwifruit"2
This is someone’s job: Get the world to subconsciously accept Chinese control of the South China Sea using product placement.
What’s The Big Deal About The South China Sea ?
Everyone in the area wants their share (oil, fish, transit).
Claimants are generally signatories to UNCLOS (United Nations Convention for the Law Of the Sea)
China is a signatory, but ignored a ruling against their claim anyway, when it didn’t go their way.
Australia and other countries would prefer an UNCLOS settlement between parties and insist on freedom of navigation for all.
Xi Jin Ping told the world he would not militarise the SCS and promptly militarised the SCS.
The Chinese military are increasingly belligerent, especially to air and ocean craft belonging to smaller nations like Australia, that continue to conduct Freedom of Navigation Operations (FONOPS) to assert norms of free passage in international waters.
The Chinese claim was dreamed up by geographer Bai Mei Chu in the mid 1930’s as a stretch goal for the newly emerging nation.
Coral reefs and habitats have been destroyed to turn underwater atolls into airstrips, harbours and missile bases.
To put it into perspective, artificial islands sum to an area bigger than the Sydney Central Business District and surrounding suburbs.
Chinese Confrontation With Australian Service Men and Women in the South China Sea:
Australia, like many other countries, fly military aircraft and sail naval vessels through the South China Sea (SCS) as Freedom of Navigation Operations (FONOPS).
The purpose is to retain the norm that the SCS are international waters that we should be able to pass through freely and unhindered. We have made the significant compromise of avoiding being within 12 nautical miles of China’s illegal artificial military island bases, presumably because of the asymmetry of military capability between Australia and China3.
The following are examples of publicly known incidents where the Chinese military has increased the pressure on Australian service people.
February 2022 - Laser Attack:
Australian pilots had lasers shone at them by the Chinese military. Fortunately they did not crash, but we know nothing about their eye injuries.
June 2022 - Aluminium Chaff Attack:
An Australian pilot of a surveillance plane had a Chinese jet fly in front and drop aluminium chaff, obscuring vision and potentially damaging engine air intakes. The pilot did not crash, but may be among RAAF crews offered counselling.
These incidents don’t energise popular opinion like footage of Australian pilots crashing in a ball of flame, but it may only be a matter of time.
The current governments “no chest beating” policy towards China may be behind the lack of reports of recent incidents, or we may be conducting less operations to mollify China.
Dear Margot (Robbie)
I can’t wait to see the Barbie movie, and I know you are busy and the map in your movie doesn’t really look like anything in particular, but:
This is serious.
How about making a short video (not on Tik Tok please)4, explaining that the map in Barbie:
was not meant to represent or support China’s claims and
that you stand with our ASEAN neighbours,
you back the UNCLOS treaty and
(Most important) you support Australian servicemen and women who are working tirelessly and being exposed to danger to uphold principles, norms and our strategic interests.
You have star power, you can use it to make money and be famous, all of which is ephemeral and transitory5.
You could also make a real difference, as a superhero in information warfare.
you may also like:
I couldn’t find it, or reference to it, on YouTube or the general web. The world has moved on. If you are really interested, you will need to watch the entire movie.
Sincere apologies to Bruno Mars.
What I’m trying to say is that they will kill us if we do that because they are bigger.
but no doubt great fun and all.